Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Baby, I'm A Free Bitch

I still haven't been subpoenaed by Tila, but I have taken part in a person boycott against her site. I do have a definition I want to share with everyone reading, who have seen Tila go on and on about how many hits her site is receiving...

Technical definition of a pageview:

A pageview is each time a visitor views a page on your website, regardless of how many hits are generated. Pages are comprised of files. Every image in a page is a separate file. When a visitor looks at a page (a pageview), they may see numerous images, graphics, pictures etc. and generate multiple hits.

For example, if you have a page with 10 pictures, then a request to a server to view that page generates 11 hits (10 for the pictures, and one for the html file). A page view can contain hundreds of hits.

If you feel the need to view her page, AdBlock is your friend. You have the ability to disable all images from her site, reducing her numbers.

We've shown her ranking and how it does against Perez, and speaking of Perez... His website has received a buyout offer for $20,000,000. If Tila is reading (we know she is) and unable to calculate all those zeros, that is twenty million dollars.

Let us take an updated look and see how Tila is doing against Perez and TMZ again...

That's odd. Tila's numbers have dropped in the past few days while TMZ and Perez's sites have picked up.

Now, let's take a moment from some Tilulz. Tila was recently interviewed for TSS. You can view that here, but please make sure you aren't drinking anything as you read.

I got a lot of laughs out of this exchange...

TSS: Yeah…everybody thinks they can rap nowadays.
Miss Tila: Yeah, exactly.
TSS: It’s terrible, really.

Reading the entire interview, it doesn't seem like it could be real. She can't be that dumb, can she? She didn't even link to the interview and she links to everything about herself. It's real and it is understandable why she would never want anyone to see it.

That's not it! There are even more Tilulz for today. While waiting to put up "exclusive" pictures of Megan Fox that had been seen on every other site days before, Tila took to her blog to copy and paste another story from a reputable source. The post is titled, "Would you buy Drew Barrymore's autobiography coloring book?" The source she cited for this story that had yet to be covered by any legit gossip blog? The Onion. Tila seriously posted a news story from The Onion as though it was real. It wasn't the only story she wasn't aware was satire; this picture of Steve Nash was posted, and along with the Drew story, was taken down hours later after everyone enjoyed a good laugh.

Back to the lolsuit! Since I am not locked up yet on felony lol charges yet, I want to post a link to an article sent to me over Twitter by @mishalay. Read here about a blogger who spoke out against a company which must not have mega mogul attorneys and private investigators. If only USA Technologies had gone through "Google people" like Tila, they could have the blogger's name, address, and GENDER!

Finally, word on the street is that Leo Madrid is now a free bitch too. If that is true, congratulations to you, Leo! You deserve an award ... and one of those Hazmat showers.


Unknown said...

TSS: That makes sense. Can you give me a sample of the hottest 16 from your album?

Miss Tila: A what?

TSS: The hottest 16. A sample of the hottest 16.

Miss Tila: The hottest 16? From my album? [15 second pause] You want me to play it for you?

TSS: No, just a 16. The hottest 16. Just a few lines and why it’s particular telling about your album.

Miss Tila: Not “I Fucked the DJ” but another song?

TSS: Anything you’d like.

Miss Tila:

Listen — Tila’s Hot 16

TSS: So…what made that a hot 16?

Miss Tila: Well that wasn’t a hot 16. I’m on NyQuil® still.

ben_x said...

NyQuil? BS.
Maybe crack.

Joann said...

Thanks for the tip. I use Firefox and added the ad block tonight. I certainly don't want to give her a lot of traffic from me.

Sometimes I go to her gossip site to read the comments left when she post an article that catches my eye. The comments are too funny. Just about every comment is negative.

Anonymous said...

They totally destoryed her on Dlisted. Enjoy