Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Who Is Stalking Tila?

Apparently everyone is stalking Tila these days. Have you read her website? You're a stalker. Have you read an article about her? You're a stalker. You think she's lying and call her out on it? Stalker. Do you remember something she's talked about in the past? You're such a stalker, you will be getting a restraining order from her private investigator after she gets your information from Mr. Google.

Here are some of the best comments from Tila's website where she calls people out for stalking when they are doing anything but... Some of the replies to her stalking claims are too good not to include. Click on each image for a full size view.

Knowing one of very few Lamborghini dealerships in Los Angeles, but it not being the one Tila went and posed in front of cars at? Stalking. That's right. If I say, "Tila, were you at Toys R Us in Vancouver today?" and she wasn't, I'm stalking.

Everyone who Tila considers a hater writes for some magic hater website that was taken down. Not only are "haters" stalkers, but according to Tila, they are now terrorists too. Yes ... Terrorists.

Saying a website will be explosive is a threat? Threatening to post nude pictures of P. Diddy and his girlfriend and going on and on about "going innnnn" on actual celebrities, hyping up blog posts where you're going to "reveal secrets" about famous people who have done nothing to warrant such harassment from you? That is what you do Tila. How are you so dense, girl?

Knowing that Tila's sister writes for her website? Stalking. Here Tila claims her sister doesn't write for her site though. We've already proved that Tila's sister does write blogs on Tila's site.

Did you read the LA Times article about Tila tying up her dog to a stripper pole? If you said yes, you must remember having read that article. Not only are you a stalker, but you are also mentally ill.

A Tila fan indirectly calls a "hater" fat, saying they should go eat a Happy Meal. A "hater" replies, calling the fan a hypocrite. This isn't stalking, but it is what Tila defines as a cyber bully. No, not the person calling someone fat, but the person calling them a hypocrite.

Tila talked about being on an awards show. The people in charge of guests on that show said she wasn't going to be on it. People knowing that are stalkers.

Telling Tila she stole a song? Stalking.

While telling Tila to kill herself might not be the most thought provoking and innovative comment, it isn't stalking. Nor would private investigators, of which she has, care.

When reading replies like the one Tila used there, I forget that she is nearly 30 years old. 30, and she is acting like that.

The replies to Tila in that one sum it up pretty well. The first comment is about a post Tila had made less than a weeek before. Remembering something Tila said less than a week before? Totally stalking.

This comment is about something Tila said in that exact post ... That her computer was broken so she couldn't post new pictures. That person bringing up that Tila said it is, according to Tila, breaking the law.

Here are some that don't have anything to do with stalking, but are good for the lulz.

We've all heard this one before from Tila. Each time I read it, I laugh more than the last.

I'm sure Michael W. Michalak, the current U.S. Ambassador to Vietnam is as worried about being dethroned as Perez Hilton was.

Some facts about Ambassador Michalak:

  • Bachelor of Science degree from Oakland University
  • Master of Science degree in Physics from The Catholic University of America
  • Second Master's degree in Public Administration from the John F. Kennedy School of Government
  • Deputy Chief of Mission to the US Embassy in Tokyo
  • Award for valor for his actions in time of crisis when the U.S. Embassy in Islamabad was burned down
  • 30 years of service with the U.S. Department of State

I'm sure Tila will include her own quote in her resume to become Ambassador...

I knew out of high school I didn't want to go to college. I knew what whatever I did wouldn't have anything to do with college. And the only reason I wanted to go was to further educate myself. Right now I'm still interested in taking classes, but only to educate myself with subjects I like, like history or English. What I didn't want to do was go to college for an actual degree because there's nothing out there I like besides doing something that involves the entertainment industry. Other than that I also have business plans that I don't need a college education for--at least not for what I want to do. I'm going to have my own business, but at the same time I'm going to try to do this rockstar thing.

Ambassador Michalak better head back to college. She's a tough one to beat for a position like that.

Not only was Tila in her mother's womb during the Vietnam war, she was also in Vietnam during the war ... which ended in 1975 ... while she was born in 1981.

And with that, I thank you all for stalking my blog.

Monday, July 26, 2010

Tila's Dream Car

Tila has been talking about getting herself a brand new car. It's probably going to be worth millions, just like her mogul mansion.

Here is a new audio post where Tila talks about getting her new car.

In it, Tila says "Otherwise, it's back to the bus, even though I don't take the bus. Because I've never been on the bus."

That's odd, because Tila just posted something completely contradicting that statement.

What is it Tila? Have you never been on the bus or did you have to take it all the time to work in the flea market? And the train? In Houston? That's funny, Houston's METRORail service did not start until January 1, 2004. Houston did have a street car, but that service ended in 1940. You probably rode it to the flea market, Tila? Didn't you? After all, you were born in 1981 after being in your mother's womb during the Vietnam war.

Tila is also posting about how she is going to pay millions for this new "Lambo" when she said something completely different earlier.

I've been very busy lately and haven't had time to update. It looks like Tila still hasn't learned how not to be so damn obvious when she lies, though. Keep it up, girl.

It doesn't look like Tila's lies have been helping her site stats much.

There is less than a week left to July and no chance she'll get even half the hits she got in June, which were a big drop from what she got in May.

Perez can breathe easy again.

Friday, July 2, 2010

They Took Our Jawbs

First, let's get a laugh at this Tila Q&A moment...

This was asked when Tila was going on about how the "real" Tila is nice and innocent and positive. Tila's answer?

What? Really, Tila? The girl who talks about a young girl's weight wasn't you? You fired that girl?

Tila, get your head out of your ass and get your lies straight. It's not even funny when your lies about your lies are this incoherent.

Haters took our jaaawbs!

I thought there was only one "hater" from Iowa who lived in a pedophile apartment? Amazing that one person who is so amateur they can't hide behind a proxy has the ability to get a poor, innocent man fired.

Maybe that man should try to belittle the hat next time?