Thursday, April 29, 2010

Tila Tequila Records

Earlier this year, Tila signed Raz B to her "record label" ... It didn't end well. Tila threatened to sue Raz for releasing a mixtape without her help, after she was of no help getting anything else released by him. Tila was featured on one song, but went on a rant, acting as though she wrote and produced an entire album and wasn't getting any credit. This is shortly after Tila claimed she would be setting up a photoshoot for Raz, which turned into being a photoshoot where Raz ended up in the background of a few pictures of Tila.

Tila has yet to sue. Raz B is still releasing his mixtape. We are still waiting for that cease and desist e-mail.

Next up to Tila Tequila Records, Texaz Twinz. Tila issued a "press release" through her blog to let everyone know about them.

We hadn't heard much else on the signing of Texaz Twinz since then. Then people started asking them what was up and they finally replied.

Now there is Rob, another artist Tila has "signed" to her record label. (There are no records of Tila Tequila Records existing that anyone can find yet.) She made a post to her blog, announcing that she signed Rob.

Tila mentions that Rob was one of the last two standing on New Zealand Idol.

Finishing seventh is nothing to be embarassed about. It's much higher than Tila would ever rank. We heard her sing on her karaoke strip tour and if she ever made it to any of the Idol shows, she'd be seen on the first few episodes where the horrible singers are featured for laughs. We have no idea why she needs to lie about how Rob placed on the show, as he still did well.

Rob has talked with people who dislike Tila over Twitter and Facebook. He's a very nice guy and we can only hope he gets out before it is too late. We don't want to see Tila do to him what she did to Raz B, The Game, or Shawne Merriman.

Tila has made it clear that she doesn't care how horrible the press she gets is, as long as she gets it. She has made it a point to try to ruin the careers of friends, colleagues, and people she doesn't even know, just to get negative press for herself. The last line of Tila's post about signing Rob is an eerie foreshadowing of what is possibly to come. His life will never be the same? Pow? We will have to wait and see.

Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Gossip RSS

It has been months since Tila first discussed her celebrity gossip blog. When she showed us a preview of it, she said it would be the newest "it" blog and would bring down Perez Hilton. It looked to be extremely influenced by Perez, down to the MS Paint drawings and well thought out and intelligent nicknames.

Updated with screencap on 05/01/10

One of the first launch dates for Tila's blog was March 16th. Along with the people who were going to help finance the blog, that date came and went. The next date was April 1st. That became simply became the first week in April, on to the last week in April. Tila gave us a new time frame last night.

That's only a few days away, but an RSS feed of Tila's blog has leaked. Remember when Tila said she had paparazzi "on lock" and her blog would be original because she had sources? Us too. It turns out those sources are the blogs she claims to be going up against in the "celebrity gossip blog" game.

Let's have a look...

That's an interesting story to cover. People, TMZ, ONTD, and every other site have covered it. How exclusive that Tila is covering it too! Wait, that breaking news banner across the top of the image looks familiar. Oh, that's right!

Tila, who once threatened any blogger for screencapping her contradictions on her blogs and Twitter, is now saving and reprinting images directly from TMZ. She also cites and links to TMZ, among others, in her posts.

Then there is her claim that Sandra Bullock is copying her by adopting a black child. Maybe Tila should have read the TMZ article she took the image from, where it said, "[Sandra] also reveals that she's adopted a 3 1/2 month old boy named Louis Bardo Bullock -- and though she and Jesse started the adoption process four years ago and brought the boy home together in January, she now plans to raise him as a single parent."

Where are the children of the ten nationalities you were going to adopt again, Tila? Don't get us started on the three fake pregnancies that happened all within 2010 either, girl.

Even funnier is this item she posted...

Tila says M.I.A. is now an "opportunists" because she married someone with money. Really, Tila? Really? How many (fake) karats was that cubic zirconia ring your "wifey" gave you? How many times did you have to let us know she was an heiress to the Johnson and Johnson fortune? How many times did you talk about her money you thought she had when it turned out she was actually cut off from the family? How many times did you talk about how sue-happy you were?

Tila, your jealousy is showing. M.I.A. is out there doing something while you're watching from the background, wishing that your strip club appearance got you 1/10th the attention M.I.A. gets for being someone original who doesn't get her videos pulled from YouTube for copyright infringement.

So much for Tila's blog standing out because of its originality or exclusiveness. If we want the information Tila's going to post, we will go to the original sources to get it.

UPDATE: Tila's bitch-boy, who she blackmailed into submission, was quick to say the site was being tested and everything has since been deleted. That didn't go as planned, did it? The Gods of laughter are on our side today and lucky for us, everything was screencapped.

Friday, April 16, 2010


It must be a very slow news month, because many people are willing to have Tila show up for interviews. She is making her way around New York City, managing to contradict herself in nearly every single interview she gives. We'll wait for her strip club tour to come to an end and attempt to put together a montage of her best contradictions and all out lies. Until then, take a look at what she had to say in a new Out Magazine interview when asked if she considered herself a role model for the gay community:

I was the first one to put out a TV show about bisexuality and a lot of people came out to me at the time and said, "Your show really helped me come out." And then, right after season 2, Katy Perry made "I Kissed a Girl" and then everybody was kissing girls and then Ellen [DeGeneres] came out and everybody started coming out, slowly.

While we must give Out Magazine credit on adding an editor's note that Ellen came out years before Tila made a career out of lying, we wanted to show this so that anyone who might not have read that interview can see exactly how delusional this woman really is.

Let us add another note: Jill Sobule's "I Kissed a Girl" was out (in 1995) before Katy Perry's version and before Ellen (1997) too.

Thursday, April 15, 2010

Tila Agave

Our first post to this blog was all about Tila's alcohol allergy. She's gone out of her way to try to claim that you will not see her drinking because she is allergic. We proved otherwise. This blog was created to point out her lies and inconsistencies. If we wanted to point them all out, we'd need a staff the size of the New York Times, so we go with what we can.

Last night, Tila took her strip show to a place called Greenhouse. Pictures have been posted on other sites, like The Superficial, of her singing while people are walking away, the crowd looking bored, or people not paying her any attention as she tries her hardest to get them to look at her. These are the pictures that caught our eyes though...

It wasn't her crooked nipples hanging out of her ill fitting dress that caught our eye. It's what is in her hand...

There we go. What is that she is drinking? It must be water. Tila is allergic to alcohol, so it can't be anything like that.

Wait a second. That's 80 proof Alma de Agave Blanco.

Here is to hoping Mr. Bradshaw, Garry Sun, and Leo Madrid rushed Tila to the hospital after seeing her with this bottle in her hand. She still has to promote her song about condomless sex and that might be hard while suffering from an allergic reaction.

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

Safe Sex

Yesterday, Tila released her new song. The title is "I Fucked the DJ". After reading the lyrics, this article about Lady Gaga I had read earlier popped into my head. Love her or hate her, you have to hand it to Gaga for what she said in the article and what she does to keep her fans safe.

"Something I do want to celebrate with my fans is that it's okay to be whomever it is that you want to be," Lady Gaga said in an interview with London's Daily Mail. "You don't have to have sex to feel good about yourself, and if you're not ready, don't do it."

And, if you're lucky enough to score a ticket to one of her concerts, the "Bad Romance" singer says you'll get a free reminder of her personal message of celibacy.

"If you are ready, there are free condoms given away at my concerts when you're leaving," she said.

When you have as big of an impression on the youth of today as Lady Gaga, it's great to see this type of thing being promoted.

Now, on the other end of the spectrum, let us get back to the lyrics of Tila Tequila's new song...

I fucked the DJ, his dick was real big
Spun me right round like a record and he killed it
I took it in like a champ I'm a real chick

Cream in my middle like an Oreo
Got you on rock ride cock like the rodeo

Motherfuckas love him, got him 1 2 steppin
And I put the pussy on him raw, no protection

Glorifying unsafe sex? Maybe if protection was used while having sex with this DJ, there wouldn't be a creamy Oreo substance in her middle.

The average age of Tila's small, but very naive and impressionable, fan base is about 15 years old. We cannot stop them from listening to Tila's songs, which promote sex without a condom and one night stands, but we can hope that they are also fans of Lady Gaga and are listening to the message that she is sending out: You don't have to have sex, but if you do, please use protection!

Tila is currently on a "tour" of New York City to promote this song. Last night, this included Tila stripping while her ever classy group of friends (Garry Sun, Leo Madrid, and Anthony "Mr. Bradshaw" Suncin) egged on this behavior, even filming and taking pictures of it.

Tila doesn't have much time left in New York to promote her song, but you can contact her remaining stops. Let them know exactly what her lyrics are saying and what she is promoting.

If you have had unprotected sex and you would like to find out information on testing for HIV and other STDs, please visit the CDC website Visit LoveToKnow to find out where to get free condoms.

Monday, April 12, 2010


Wait. What is that? Tila is finally admitting that she is not pregnant?

I'm sure Tila's world class baby doctor prescribed the Marlboro Lights.

She also mentions Casa Wilson (not by name, but she can't help but publicize everything in her life, so we know who she means), who she was engaged to and then she wasn't.

She recently posted to her personal Facebook page that the entire thing was an April Fool's joke, even though the engagement supposedly happened in March. She said they were only friends.

Then they were engaged again and now it seems they no longer are.

There was a bit of an incident that happened with Casa over the past few days. I'm sure Mr. Wilson has quite the story to sell.

Thursday, April 8, 2010

Tila's Advice

Tila has given up trying to convince people she is pregnant through the in vitro fertilization injection she received in her arm. It must also be hard to be a mogul out of a two bedroom apartment, because there hasn't been much talk of her record label either. Even the celebrity gossip blog's release has been pushed back at least four separate times.

When you've got nothing else going on in your life, you can always talk to your underage fans and give them advice. Because, honestly, who wouldn't seek advice from someone who faked more than one pregnancy, someone whose last two "relationships" were the epitome of what a relationship should be, or someone who had a fake charity?

Since the advice she gives is so absurd and not even worth posting, we'll post a link to something better. Chelsea Handler did an interview with the Miami New Times Blog and was asked about her least favorite guest. The answer isn't surprising at all, but we'd love to see Tila try to "go innn" on Chelsea because of it.

Tuesday, April 6, 2010

Love and TV

Tila has been talking a lot lately about her new television gig. According to this article (note: there is a poll along with that article), Tila says she will be a guest host on WWE Raw. Is this the television show she has been going on about? A one night guest hosting gig? Now, the rumor about Tila guest hosting is coming from Tila's own mouth, so we'll have to take that for what it is worth.

She admits to not knowing anything about wrestling, but she did last almost a week in another publicity stunt of a relationship with a bodybuilder.

They were possibly introduced by their mutual friend, Gary, who has gone on and on for the past few days, trying to take credit for their relationship.

After going on her endless rant about anal sex, lube, and other things which do not need to be seen again, Tila talked about how excited she was to soon be marrying this new random person in her life.

Isn't that nice? Marriage and adoption (why it has to specifically be a black child is beyond us). Wait a second, what happened to Tila's newly formed baby that she conceived by an in vitro injection in the arm?

Well, less than an hour after her nice post about becoming the wife of Casa Wilson and adopting a child, Tila says that she hopes to become pregnant when she rapes him.

First Tila supports Chris Brown for abusing Rihanna, saying she deserved it, and now she jokes about rape.

Such a classy woman. Who wouldn't want their daughters looking up to a person like this?

After more talking about sex and pizza, Tila changed the subject back to adoption.

Today is Tuesday. Instead of it being adoption day, Tila declared it her "chill day" instead and is now asleep.

There are still 12 hours left to Tuesday, so let's give her the benefit of the doubt and see if she flies out to meet her African-American baby today.

What about that relationship with Casa, you ask? This is how that culminated...

That is the last we've read about the two of them. He has since changed his Facebook picture, which was of him and Tila, to one of him alone.

Gary also had a reaction to the possible demise of the relationship...

I'm sure Tila's Oakland adoption agency would love to hear how her relationship went with Casa. How could they object to a woman who openly talks about fighting in the street with a man, jokes about rape, and has lied about adopting children from Haiti, Vietnam, Africa, and Russia.

Let us hope that Casa did not "make a baby" when Tila raped him, because as she told Radar Online less than one week ago, she doesn't "have time to take care of an infant."